You know You’re Playing Small When….
So, what happens when you dim your light?
In the infamous words of Marianne Williamson:
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous,
talented and fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other
people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of
God that is within us.
When you let your light shine, you unconsciously give others permission to do the same.
Real Truth: you never reach your true potential and you seldom change the lives of others. You wander from one thing to the next, never really settling on what you should be doing to leave a legacy because you’ve decided that being who you were created to be isn’t really all that great, and that somehow if you downplay who you are, you will help more people.
Am I describing you?
Here’s My Question; Why did you become an entrepreneur and start your own business if you weren’t going to shine?
Real Talk: entrepreneurship takes guts. Guts to move when everyone else is saying stay. Guts to invest when others are holding on tightly to their wallets. Guts to lead when everyone else is falling into the crowd. You have to be willing to lose when others are winning.
So, why do so many entrepreneurs play small? Doing just enough to get by instead of going big?
It’s because they are fearful of what others will think of them when they win. Or, it’s for fear of what they will think of themselves.
I know you’re saying, “No, that’s not me,” but isn’t it?
You hold back on your gifting and don’t figure out how to make it work by investing in yourself because the thought of winning, of succeeding, scares the bejesus out of you!
Then there are those of you who believe that you are playing big, doing everything you know to do so that you can grow your business yet it’s not happening.
What’s your problem?
You see, abundance flows freely in situations and circumstances when we are transparent and open to receiving all the gifts that God and His abundant universe have for us.
DO YOU DO THIS:
(Pay attention to the list to see where you are downplaying your God inspired gifts and worth because it’s time for a Stiletto Step Up as, as we call it in the society)
1. When someone gives you a compliment, you say, “Oh, that, that was nothing.” Instead of taking a bow and just saying thank you.
How do I know?
Because I use to do the same thing. The thought that someone wouldn’t like me if they knew how good I was at whatever it was made me want to appear less great. You do realize that it’s very easy to just say thank you. It makes the giver of the compliment feel good because they were able to give you something that was received.
2. Not charging what you’re worth or not charging at all. You don’t charge what you know you should for fear that they will not pay you and you have come to the conclusion that some income is better than none so you charge less and feel horrible about it.
Whenever you don’t get paid what you’re worth, you are not able to give freely unto others. You perform the task they underpaid you for with disdain and that shows.
3. Not investing in yourself or your business. When you don’t invest it’s for one of two reasons:
one, you’re fearful about the financial commitment or two, you believe you know it all and don’t need help.
We all need help. There is no such thing as a self-made millionaire. We all need others to achieve our goals and dreams. If you could do it by yourself, it would already be done.
I dare you to ask a millionaire if he became one all by himself. Ask one and I bet you he will name the countless people who aided in his journey.
4. Not accepting gifts. By not taking a gift that someone is giving you, you are bringing more strife into your life. The flow of abundance stagnates as soon as you don’t accept it. Remember giving and receiving are spiritual foundations.
5. Not accepting an opportunity. When given an opportunity based on something you’ve asked for but you don’t take it for fear of failure or success, you are downplaying your God Inspired gifts and you magnificence which means that you really want to remain the way you’ve been. Change or growth is really not your desire, which means you are lying to yourself and more importantly to God.
6. Withholding. This is the big one. Examples of withholding include not tipping your waiter or waitress accordingly when out to eat or my favorite: not being your best at all times – a true downplay. Holding back who you are and what you are capable of because you fear that others will judge you.
So how do you stop downplaying who you really are, Stiletto Step Up, and start experiencing true abundance?
Own it. As they say, “ownership is 9/10th of the law.”
When you completely, fully own who you are and what you were created to do by taking personal responsibility, you get to enjoy the law of circulation and all of its fruits in your life consistently.
Ownership is serious. In fact, it’s mandatory if you desire to play big and help others to experience transformation through you.
Ownership is about developing, mastering and implementing the mindset shifts and beliefs that exhibit power in all areas of your life.
When you develop the confidence and poise to trust what you’ve been given to share with the world, by saying an unequivocal yes, you start to experience the benefits of ownership. And I, for one, believe that ownership has its privileges.
1. List all of the ways you have been downplaying your God inspired gifts and worth.
2. Get clear on the reasons why you have chosen those self-sabotaging behaviors.
3. Ask yourself if there is any evidence to support why you have been behaving this way?
4. Now that you are aware of the ways you have been downplaying, create a plan of how you will stop downplaying immediately going forward.
5. When you are allowing abundance to flow into your life and business, what will your life and business look like? Describe what you want instead.
6. How does this vision make you feel?
NEED SUPPORT FINDING YOUR FLOW FACTOR?
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Shameca Tankerson is Founder of Stiletto Wealth Society, a global community Dedicated to Empowering Women Entrepreneurs To Get Bold and use Breakthrough Business Strategies to Uncover their Flow Factor™, Gain Confidence they can Cash In, and leverage it to Build an Amazing Life and Business.
She is passionate about empowering women who find themselves playing small and are deeply and secretly scared of showing up as POWERFUL, DYNAMIC, and CONFIDENT to courageously own “who they be” and leverage it!
Posted on October 9, 2013, in business, Encourage Me Girl, Money Moxie & Financial Mojo and tagged business success, SCORE, shameca tankerson, small business. Bookmark the permalink. 6 Comments.
Hi Shameca, I’m visiting from UBC. Very interesting monologue you write and certainly it does give one a reason to pause. I know I’ve not been at my best on days and other days, when I make an effort, I do end up feeling much better. It’s also true what you say about being brave. I’ve been meaning to start an etsy store, offer creative videos and e courses, but have been too overwhelmed with where to begin. Time to start chipping away at it.
Nice to meet you and I hope you have a lovely rest of the week. 🙂
Congrats on challenging yourself to Step Up Veronica. Set some goals and take it one step at a time.
Yep Peggy it’s best to focus on what you do best and have a business model that fits your personality style. Otherwise being a business owner can be draining and depleting when it should be invigorating!
awesome post. I’m definitely guilty of many of the things you mentioned that are blocking my growth and abundance in my business. Thanks for sharing this!
take 2 of trying to comment.
this was an awesome post! Definitely made me see where I’m guilty at and blocking my way to abundance. Thanks for sharing this!
Awesome Ashley! Being aware is the first step to breakthrough and Step Up!